Category Archives: (5) Exploring body image

Breasts that aren’t breasts

Over the last couple of days I’ve been reflecting on how I now have breasts that aren’t breasts. It is an odd thing really. They look like breasts. To the external toucher, they feel like breasts (or so my husband tells me). The nipples don’t react to anything, because at the moment they don’t have… Read More »

Selfies

While walking today I found myself reflecting on why I no longer take selfies when I walk. Early on, and throughout chemotherapy, I always took a selfie of me smiling while I walked along the trail. I don’t do that anymore. One reason, is that I’m in theory finished treatment. Although my body aches, I… Read More »

Celebrating my boob job and cancer language

Several women in the breast cancer blogosphere have commented on how inappropriate it is to say to someone with breast cancer that “at least you get a free boob job” or any variant thereof (see Reconstruction after breast cancer: It’s not a boob job). I agree. If you have never had breast cancer, you really… Read More »

I look good but … and real hugs

I look good but I feel like crap. Actually, mentally I feel good. I took a higher dose of drugs last night (and more melatonin) so I slept better than I’ve slept in a while. Unfortunately, I’m having another side effect – at least that is what we think it is – we think it… Read More »

lightening up …

It may not seem like much, but today marks an important transition in my healing. It has been four weeks since my surgery, and the first time since my last surgery (November 19) my breasts don’t feel heavy!  They feel like they are starting to soften up (a hard spot that was there yesterday isn’t… Read More »

And then there was one …

I was really hoping to have both my drains pulled today, but truth be told, neither had output low enough to warrant being pulled (close by not quite). I do wonder if it had more do with my mental health than anything else; when, they did remove one of the remaining abdominal drains. So, now… Read More »

A small cup of coffee

I am reminded that recovery is slow. Although I was happy to announce the end of active treatment, I still need to recover from that treatment. I was lucky in that I only had two surgeries. Many women go through this process with a lot more surgeries a lot further spread out – such that… Read More »

Surgery – Initial impressions and day 2 drama

The first time I looked down at my new breasts (day after surgery, during the first dressing change), my first thought was that they were a little smaller than I expected. Now, I had told me surgeons that I’d be happy with about a 20% reduction in size, but somehow, I didn’t really internalize what… Read More »